Uncle Mike, Can I Call You That?

Dear Mike,

When people ask me how many siblings I have, I say three brothers. Two older, one younger.  And while you're not technically older than me and haven't been for some time now, you still feel like my older brother.  I remember a long time ago, not too long after you died, I was talking to Andy about that.  When someone asks you if you have any brothers and sisters, and if so how many or how old are they.  You want to say the truth that you have three but that feels kind of weird because you have two alive and one dead.  You could say three and leave it at that but that kind of feels like lying because you are withholding information.  The thing is typically a person that asks you that question doesn't know you very well and you don't exactly want to say "my brother was killed" to someone you barely know.  Honestly, now, it doesn't really bother me to divulge that information, although at has been quite some time since you died.  But frankly, talking about how you died doesn't ruin my day anymore.  Sometimes missing you does, or memories I have good or bad, but the bare facts surrounding your death I can handle.

But now, I'm older, I have kids of my own, and I think of you not only as my brother but also as Uncle Mike.  Now, that feels weird.  Like that's a lie.  On a family tree it would be accurate.  I consider you their Uncle Mike even though you've never met them. Or, maybe you have.  I'm often convinced you must be Fionn's guardian angel.  Even though they have never met you there is still a role you play in their life.  I learn so much from you all the time.  There is so much about you they can learn from and connect with.  You would be a great uncle for them to have around.  While I mostly see how you and Fionn would connect on so many levels I know as Corri gets older she too would make those connections.  For one thing, she loves tie-dye as do Fionn, and Matthew.

So would you be their Uncle Mike, their guardian angel up in heaven, their angel on earth when their in need, would you please?

Love,

Gabby

P.S. I get to go visit you soon.  I'm excited because I can't remember the last time I got to.  I've wanted to for so long, but it's been hard to be able to.  I want to do something special for you but haven't figured out what yet.  I'll let you know what I decided.